Day Eighteen Has Voted; 48 Still Undecided

Today Lynnette and I walked 15 miles in preparation for our 3-Day. We started at 5:30 am. God knew we needed a break, so He kept the sun hidden in the clouds until we were finished. We found a new friend at Mile 10, when Nemo the dog joined us. He walked 3 miles with us, then decided we weren't that much fun, and returned to his home.

In another 3-Day activity, I have finished my "sash" for the event. This is a Miss America thing that says "Fifty and Fabulous" on the front. On the back and front I have pink ribbons with names of the people in whose honor I am walking. All it took was some iron-on stuff (thanks Molly!) and needle and thread. One would think I will look quite the diva, but these 3-Day walkers are serious about their outfits!

After our trek, I refueled, took a nap, let the I-Squeeze massage my aching feet, and soaked in the tub. It's been a fairly quiet day. Maribeth called from a mountain somewhere in Maine. It's hard to believe 23 years ago I was about to go into labor with her!!

Today went by quickly. The walk and completing the sash took huge chunks out of the day. I didn't really make any significant strides towards completing the seven. Am I disappointed or discouraged? No, and here's why:

Today I focused on this 60-mile walk I am doing in August. I completed two tasks that I needed to get done - the sash and a long walk. I feel good because I know I am preparing myself so that this experience will be all that I hope it to be.

I didn't make any progress towards the seven remaining goals. But today wasn't about the seven. Today was about the 3-Day. I needed today to focus on this event. Tomorrow I will probably get back to the seven.

It's good to have a day to focus on one thing. But it's important for me not to make any one thing the one and only thing every single day. If I listen to God, He will direct me as to what I can do best on any given day. If I listen, I will feel satisfied in what I do on that day, and not be concerned with what I don't do. I will feel content and not waste a day bemoaning those things that were put on the shelf.

It's good to have a variety of days. There are days when I make great strides in my goals, days I get a lot of tasks completed, days I examine my life as a whole, days I focus on just one thing, and days I just vegetate.

One of my changes I see is my ability to recognize that all days are good and worthwhile. I just have to recognize and appreciate the value of the day for what it is, whether it is a busy day or a lazy day.

I have one of my favorite poems hanging in my bathroom. I think it sums up how I feel about the days I am given. I'll close with it:

This is the beginning of a new day.

God has given me this day to use as I will.

I can waste it---or use it for good,

but what I do today is important,

because I am exchanging a day of my life for it!

When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever,
leaving in its place, something that I have traded for it.
I want it to be gain, and not loss;
good, and not evil; success, and not failure,
in order that I shall not regret the price I have paid for it.
~Anonymous~

Day Seventeen is Swimming, 49 Waiting to Dive In

Wow. Now I'm down to the 40s in terms of days left. D-Day is exactly seven weeks from today. Technically, that amounts to one remaining goal a week. Wow.

Today I walked exactly eight miles. I went slowly, as to not re-injure the ankle from yesterday. I also went to Curves. With such a productive day yesterday list-wise, I didn't have many tasks to complete today.

I did get my "alternative activity" chart complete and printed off. This is the list of what I've come up with so far: First I will list the trigger, then the alternate activity:

Boredom: take a walk, read, write an email

Pain: take a nap, soak in the tub, take a painkiller, use I-Squeeze

Frustration: write about frustration, take stuff to Goodwill, take a walk

Procrastination: go over "to do" list, leave house

Fatigue: take a nap, get in bed, take a shower

Sadness: write about sadness, watch funny movie, look at photos

Anger: write about anger, jog

Leftovers: scrape food into trash

This is the first draft of many, I hope. I will add to it as more ideas come up, and take away those ideas that don't work. The main thing is to STOP and think about why I am putting something into my mouth, see if the reason is on this chart, then veer off into another direction rather than the pantry or refrigerator.

The rest of today was fairly uneventful. I did get two stories written for my book "Flu." I'm still a long way from completing this goal, but I'm proud that I finally have started. I just have to discipline myself to spend time every day writing.

This evening we had dinner at Demos' with Sam, Lynnette, and Molly. It was good as usual. My meal was nothing to brag about point-wise, but I enjoyed it.

Tonight will be an early night, as Lynnette and I plan to start at 5:30 am for our 15-mile training walk. I can hardly believe that seven weeks from today, we'll be finishing our first 20-mile day!!

Today was a positive day in terms of progress towards my goals. Some of the eight require more mental preparation than physical. The mental is often harder to develop than the physical. But today I took a step forward. Today was a quiet day. Small steps were taken, but I'm headed towards those goals. In seven weeks, I hope to have made them all.

Day Sixteen Has Been Kissed; 50 Still Puckering Up

I have a little black book. Inside there is a page for each day. Each day's page has a list of things to do for that day. I list everything I need to do, from the obvious (jog, workout at Curves), to the urgent (pay bills, go to the bank), to the mundane (empty trash, refill bird feeder). Every task I complete, I mark with a check mark. If I complete a task not on the list, I add it to the list and check it off. The tasks I don't complete go on the list for the next day. The reason I share this is because today I managed to complete 18 out of 20 tasks, which hopefully will make up for the shortcomings in the day.

I intended to get up early and jog. However, my mind and body did not think too highly of this idea. I started out later than usual, but my legs just did not want to cooperate. I decided to walk five miles instead of eight. As I got to the one-mile mark, I got too close to the edge of the road, and turned my ankle. This is not an unusual occurrence, but when it does happen, it curtails my jogging for the day. I walked the mile back home.

I got today's list out, and decided to head for the grocery store, since it is fairly empty at 7:30 in the morning. I also went to the bank and post office. I got back home, put the groceries away, and headed for Curves.

After Curves, I accomplished a few other tasks on the list before lunch. Lunch was not pretty. It started out innocently, with a leftover hamburger. Followed by popcorn. Finished off with a bowl off ice cream. With chocolate sauce. Did I try to talk myself out of this? Not really. Would I have listened had I tried? Probably not. Afterwards, I felt stuffed and promptly fell asleep, only to wake up in a post-gorge haze. Another reason, if I needed one, to get this food thing under control - over indulgence in food makes me sluggish.

Luckily for me, I had five different stores I needed to visit in order to return various items. I forced myself into the car, and took off for the mall. Getting out and about helped; at least I was moving. I got the items returned or exchanged, checked my eight-mile jogging route (I had shorted myself 4/10 of a mile), and returned home to get more things checked off today's list.

I cooked beef tips and mashed potatoes for supper. After Steve and I had finished, there was about one serving left, so guess what - I ate it.

All this eating resulted in my getting out my lap top and completing the "alternative activities to eating" chart. I'm still thinking of other things to do instead of grabbing a bite, should you have any suggestions. So far, I've listed my triggers as: Boredom, Frustration, Sadness, Anger, Pain, Leftovers, and Procrastination. Next to each trigger, I've listed things I will do instead of grabbing a bite. I hope to continue to add to the list as ideas come up.

So, how did today stack up? This morning I did something that I hadn't planned to do until August 24 - I weighed. According to the scales, I need to lose 19 pounds. Today didn't help. But I realize even more how much I need to control the food aspect of my life. Although I really didn't want to know how much I needed to lose to reach my goal, maybe this will encourage me. Now I have a way to gauge my success on a weekly basis.

Today was a sobering day. I feel good about all the things I accomplished, but I am disappointed with my regression in the food management area. I am slowly preparing myself for this battle; I just can't put it off anymore. I wish change would come easily. This food issue is a battle that is going to be tough. But I know when I conquer it, I will have made a significant life change.

Today was a bit disheartening. There may be days ahead when again I will falter. But just as it was with golf a few days ago, I have to keep trying. I know I will get better at managing and controlling the food I eat. It will just take practice and planning. Eventually, I will master my food issues and meet my goal; and in the end, I will be glad I struggled through it.

Day Fifteen Goes Off; 51 Waiting To Be Lit

Happy 4th of July!

I began my morning by deciding it was time to wash the sun room windows. This is a job that has been on my daily list for weeks. After realizing a goal yesterday, I felt compelled to get this task done. I convinced Steve to do the inside while I did the outside. What an industrious start to the day!

I had planned to do a 2-mile jog this morning. I started out, but didn't get far when my body basically told me that this was not a good idea at all. I suppose after two days of pushing it, my body needed a rest. Since it was a holiday, I decided to give myself a break.

The next activity was lunch. Molly has decided to become a vegetarian, so today was going to be her last meal of fish, having already given up beef and chicken. Sam and I accompanied her to Red Lobster where we over-ate. The only thing to do next was go to the mall and have some Dippin Dots. We then took advantage of the sales and each bought two pairs of shoes, since our feet were probably the only body parts that weren't bloated by this point. I also walked into the Talbot's and promptly bought three pairs of pants, all in my "goal size." I was wearing this size a few months ago, so I am hoping this will provide even more incentive. Besides, on sale, the three cost the same as one pair at the regular price, so how could I resist?

In the afternoon, Steve and I headed for the golf course, to play my fifth round of golf. I am halfway to another goal. However, it is definitely time for some driving range practice, as I would have needed a calculator to count all my shots today. After a dinner at Arby's followed by dessert at McDonald's, it was time to return home to vegetate.

Tonight I am thinking about this whole project. It's now been two weeks since I started this. Some goals, such as the sidewalk project and the rounds of golf have been easy to see progress and to achieve. But the weight and clothes size goals are going much slower and are difficult to notice progress, at least the progress I want to see, like slipping into my new pants and having them fall off! Clearly my food issues are still in full force. My story writing seems to get lost in the day. My running goals are moving forward. Where does all this leave me?

I can see progress, but I can also see areas in which I need to work harder. I have been reading daily readings about discipline. I know that discipline is necessary if I am to achieve these goals that I really want, that are important to me. Where do I go from here?

I start by examining my goals:

Golf - playing the rounds of golf is important, because I enjoy it and want to get better at it. However, just playing by itself will not help me get better. I need practice time on the driving range and putting green, and maybe another lesson or two or three hundred.

Weight, clothes size, and food issues - these three go hand in hand. Clearly my food issues are going to circumvent my goals to lose weight and a pants size. I am still continuing to ignore the reasons I eat, justifying sharing two appetizers and adding a dessert at the end of a meal. I still haven't made my alternative activity chart. If I am truly going to attain this goal, I have got to get serious by thinking about what and why I am eating. I also need to push myself when running and exercising to burn those calories.

Running - I am making progress running two miles, and running more on my long runs. But I have to continue to push myself. Today my body was tired, and I gave myself a rest day. But I have to continue to force myself to get out and run, and run a little longer and a little faster.

Writing - I continue to put this task off, thinking I have other things to do, or nothing to write about. Yet I have conscientiously continued to write this blog every night. I am going to have to discipline myself to write stories for my book on a daily basis. Just as this blog has created a habit for me in just two weeks, I believe that if I write on a daily basis for two weeks, a new habit will be born.

So far, I think I've done a good job. But I know there is still much to be done, and I can do better. It will take discipline and clear steps to keep moving forward. But I am encouraged by my beginnings and anticipate my future progress and success.

I have a lot to do and to accomplish. These aren't just goals, but changes I want to make in my life. In turn, I have to change my life if I want to reach these goals. I believe I can do it, and look forward to the journey.

Day Fourteen Dealt; 52 in the Deck

We'll start today with a few pictures:


First task completed - The front sidewalk is done!!


Shaggy, the cat alarm clock, faces his nemesis, the door - "Shall I go out or stay in?"


Shaggy - fearless hunter or avid bird watcher?


Meanwhile, two birdies discuss that idiotic cat in the house.

Hope you enjoy the pictures. The birds are what I view from my favorite room in the house, the sun room. In the mornings, it is absolute bliss to sit out there and listen to the birds wake up and call each other to breakfast. Sometimes I get a special treat and watch as they totally immerse themselves in the birdbath. It is a blessing to watch and enjoy this world that God has created.

Of course, the best picture is the one from the front of the house. Yes, it is true - I have completed my first goal, the sidewalk project. Even though I had the offer of help today, I finished before the helper arrived (so I called Sam and told him to bring lunch instead). It took 80+ bricks, several afternoons, numerous Home Depot trips, a small garden spade, digging and pulling up old bricks, but this goal has been completed. Yay!! Now, just seven more to go.

There has been a let down today. As I was returning from my Starbucks mission this evening, I decided to measure what I thought was my 4-mile route. Apparently, the streets have been shortened, as my car measured only 3.7. This is a sad turn of events, as I have misled myself into false mileage. I shall have to verify this dilemma tomorrow. Stay tuned.

The good news on the jog front is that today I had a running partner. Steve decided to join me. Shaggy began with his usual 4:40 wake up call, but as usual could not muster the courage to venture out. I decided to go ahead and eat breakfast. Steve got up, we got ready, and were out the door at 5:30. The plan was to run to the 1.5 mile spot, where he would return home, and I would keep going on my what-was-yesterday 8 mile route. We ran the first mile, walked a bit, then ran the rest of the way to the turn around spot. I have decided that running at 5:30 is a good deal, if I can get my rear in gear. The sun is still sleeping, so the heat is bearable. We'll see if this will be a pattern.

I spent the rest of today finishing the walk and doing odds and ends. After two days of jogging/walking and toting/placing bricks, I ended the day with a long soak in the tub. Heavenly!

I received two contrasting emails today. The first was from Emily NC (not the Emily of the Puffy Muffin). Emily is a friend from over twenty years ago when our sons were preschoolers and we lived in Florida. We both moved away, and have kept in touch sparingly (mostly on my part) over the years. I reconnected with Emily NC when I emailed to get a donation for my 3-Day walk, not knowing that she was a breast cancer survivor. She has become one of my strongest supporters, getting donations from a ton of people. Even with everything she is going through, she took the time to write an encouraging email.

On the other hand, I also received an email from a former work colleague. This person was not a friend, and in fact was a unkind person. This email was all about herself, and was using email as a way to worm her way back into our lives.

What did I learn from this? A few years ago, I may have overlooked the friend, and continued to let the unfriend be cruel. Today, I immediately thanked Emily, and told the unfriend to not contact me again. Sometimes it is essential to show how much we value that which is truly important, and to cut loose that which is truly harmful. I hope that one of the changes I have made is to see the difference and begin to do both.

Today was about completing a goal, appreciating the blessings in life, and noticing and discarding the harmful things in my life. Once again, in helping me understand the difference between blessings and harmful things, God has helped me see how food can be harmful to me. I have got to get that alternative activity chart completed.

Today I appreciate a husband who slows his running pace so we can run together, a son who is willing to help me on a project, a friend who can pick up after 20+ years as if it were yesterday, birds who delight me with their beauty and antics, and my life, which has more blessings than I could even imagine. I thank God, who has blessed me with it all.

Day Thirteen is Awake, 53 Still Sleeping

Today I stepped up my eight mile route by jogging some of it, including the first mile. I just hope I can move in the morning!! But I must persevere if I am to eventually do 13.1 miles in 2 1/2 hours. I also "Curve-d", played golf this afternoon, and made one more (and hopefully last) trip to Home Depot for twenty more bricks. It looks like a Tylenol night!

I played my fourth round of golf today. I had five good shots, and 500 less than stellar ones. I even considered calling it quits after three holes. But I kept going, mainly because of this blog. I wanted to claim my fourth round, so I continued to swing away, and away, and away. Eventually, a few holes later, my shots improved - a tiny bit.

I have eight goals that I want to achieve in order to make changes in my life. But I am finding that I am changing in other ways. One of these changes is the drive to keep going even when there seems to be no reason to continue. I certainly could have quit golf today, and just ridden around with Steve. But I had a goal to reach. To reach that goal, I decided to stick with the process even if it meant taking 90 shots a hole, watching the balls fly in every direction, and wondering which I could send further - the ball or my golf club. By sticking with golf, I relaxed, and my golf game settled down. Now when I want to quit something, I will try to keep going, and look for a greater goal that will be gained in the activity. Today my golf game was not fabulous, but my completion of a goal progressed. And in the end, I enjoyed playing golf.

Someone mentioned to me today that perhaps my blog didn't reflect real life (he hasn't read it), that maybe it was just about good things. Maybe it is. I could instead keep a list of all the crappy things that happen every day, and write about them, but why waste time on the lousy things? I once tried to concentrate on the bad stuff, and to answer a friend, "It wasn't working for me." Instead, I'm going to choose to focus on the good things. I've discovered that by emphasizing the good, the bad gets diminished in the process. It doesn't go away, or get ignored, but instead it is used for good.

So was there any bad today? You decide. My golfing was abysmal, but I kept going and the outing as a whole turned out pleasant. My legs were aching and I was sweaty after jogging part of eight miles, but my time was much better. My hands are scraped and sore from loading and unloading eighty concrete bricks, but my sidewalk is almost lined and it looks good. Tomorrow I may wake up sore due to a lot of physical exertion, but maybe my weight and sizes are on their way down.

Optimistic or realistic? I prefer realistic because I don't ignore the difficulties of life, I just use them to make my life meaningful. I know I need both the good and the bad in life to make it real. I'm not sure if every bad situation can be used for good, but if I can make it work in the seemingly insignificant situations, then maybe I can cope with the big problems when they arise.

Today everything wasn't great or perfect or wonderful. Today was today with its ups and downs. But at the end of the day, I can look at the day as a whole and see how it all worked together. And in its totality, today was a good day.

Day Twelve Sprouted, 54 Still In The Ground

Ahhh, Sundays. Sundays can truly be the best days of the week, if we would only allow them to be. Today started well, since I chose to sleep in, sort of. Shaggy was in his usual 4:45 am "I want out; wait - no I don't, but I will at 5:15" routine. After he finally did go out, I decided against walking this morning and went back to sleep. It was quite wonderful to wake up at 7:00, get a cup of coffee, go into my sun room, and watch the birds and squirrels eat their breakfasts.

We decided to skip church. There are some Sundays when it's heavenly to just sit and talk when it's quiet and peaceful. Today was such a day, and Steve and I sat in the sun room and enjoyed the morning. Later we joined Molly and Sam for brunch at Jackson's. Afterwards, Steve went to the YMCA pool, and I arranged the twenty bricks I bought yesterday. I returned to Home Depot again to get twenty more. While I was shopping, if started to rain, but stopped long enough for me to load the bricks, get home, and unload them on the sidewalk. Steve had returned from the pool, and we both took a siesta on the couch.

Once the rain had stopped, I went outside and finished placing the bricks, finishing the first part of the project. I think another twenty bricks and this project will be complete!! Now if I could find a use for the 63 old bricks I took up ...

After cleaning up and watching the Diana concert for a bit, Steve and I decided to go play nine holes. In terms of my game, let's just say the first and last holes were okay. The seven holes in between are not worth mentioning. Except to say at least I didn't lose any balls!! Maribeth text-messaged me while I was on the course, saying she will be spending July 4 in Rangely.

We finished the evening with dinner at one of our favorites, Steak N Shake. I ordered the points-acceptable grilled chicken sandwich, but the cook messed up the order and also brought a huge plate of cheese fries (no charge to us). Yes, I ate a bunch, but stopped from wolfing down the whole plate (actually Steve placed it on the other side of the table).

So how did today stack up? I ate reasonably, got some exercise (we walked instead of using a golf cart), and enjoyed time with my family. I made great headway on the sidewalk project. These are the days when I feel at peace because I feel good physically due to exercise and intelligent eating, I feel content emotionally because I know my family are all secure, I feel satisfied mentally because I have accomplished a task or two, and I feel blessed spiritually because I appreciate all that I have been given.

I believe the best Sundays are those in which we can stop our busy lives, rest and relax in a peaceful place, examine and experience our blessings in life, and offer prayers of thanksgiving to God who gives them to us. Today was such a Sunday, and it was good.